Friday, August 9, 2013

He’s Got This!


I know, I know.  I missed July’s entry.  In my defense though, I blinked and July was gone! I can’t believe it’s time to start back to school, BUT I’m ready!

I am a teacher.  That’s one of a small handful of things in my life that I know, without question, I’m doing that is within God’s ultimate plan.  Will I be a teacher for the rest of my life or at least my career? Who knows, but teaching is ingrained in me.  I’ve not been in the classroom since February 18th.  For the first few months, my mind was completely distracted with new baby stuff.  Then, I noticed that it slowly started turning back on to teaching.  My two favorite subjects to teach are math and grammar.  I’m pretty sure that I like these subjects most for two reasons: 1-They’re pretty straight forward.  There is always a “right” answer. 2-EVERYBODY uses math and grammar daily…so they’re extra important.  I have found a way to “teach” these two subjects without even stepping foot in a classroom.  I’ve gotten teased a lot for my FB grammar lessons.  You are welcome to tease all you like, as long as you get something from it! “To” and “too” are NOT interchangeable! In fact, it was a math lesson (or lack thereof) that reassured me all over again, that I am meant to be a teacher.

I was at Hobby Lobby getting fabric to make some super cute pocket tees.  I didn’t need much, so as I put the bolt on the counter, I simply said, “I need a quarter.”  Vague, yes, but I assumed “a quarter” implied a quarter of a yard since this was not the first time I’d made this request.  It must have been a change in shifts because there were two girls at the counter talking.  The one who was staying asked if I meant a quarter of a yard.  At my confirmation, she then asked her co-worker how much a quarter was (as in ¼).  This question disturbed me, but then it only got worse.  The co-worker turned around as she was walking off and said, “Yes.  I like to think about it like a dollar,” (this is how I teach my 4th graders!) “There are four quarters in one dollar.”  She started to walk away again when the other girl said, “Hey! You kept my cheat sheet!”  Not being familiar with the way Hobby Lobby does things (which all frequent HL shoppers can agree that they are a little behind the times in terms of technology), I ignored the comment and continued to think about the girl (not to mention one who works in the fabric department) didn’t know that a quarter means ¼.  It was then that her understanding of math broke my teacher heart. As the co-worker handed her the cheat sheet, she said, “It’s .25.”  The cheat sheet obviously was a quick fractions-to-decimals conversion chart.  No big deal.  My heart ached at the fact that ¼ is a SIMPLE fraction and even after the co-worker referred to the measurement in terms of $1.00, the girl still didn’t make the connection to .25 or $0.25.  Maybe my reaction to the whole fraction thing is a little much, especially to non-teachers, but the girl wasn’t even making the connection.  This event reassured me that my place on this earth is in the classroom.  After all the anxiety and dread I’d had about going back to work and leaving my little Fishy, I was certain that I need to do my part in advancing the knowledge and understanding of my fourth graders.

I just wasn’t ready to go back to work in May.  I’m so very grateful for the opportunity I had, to spend nearly every waking moment of the first 5 ½ months of my baby’s life with him.  That is time that I will never get back and will always cherish.  I’m ready now.  I feel like that if I’d chosen to be a stay at home mom, I’d be wasting what God created me for.  (SAHM, Please do not think I am criticizing you.  BELIEVE me, after 5 ½ months as a SAHM, I understand that it’s just as much of a calling as being a teacher!  I don’t know how you do it.) I just know that God put me on this earth to teach, and if I didn’t do that, then I wouldn’t be following His plan for my life.

I still don’t know why I am always amazed when I realize that God knows what He’s doing!  I’ve stated before that I’m not fond of change.  I like itineraries, check-lists, and expectations.  When something happens, I’m not a “just go with it” kind of girl. I like to know how things are going to end, before they even start so naturally, the mere anticipation of going back to work made me anxious.  Like I said, God knows what He’s doing.  He’s the One who created me, so He knows how I work.  For my entire life, I’ve had to be prepared for change.  When David and I got married, I needed the year to prepare for the move that was an hour away from my comfort.  It just takes me a while to feel okay about change.  Anticipating leaving Little Man made me sick.  So, God, being the Great and Almighty One that He is, began putting ignorant people in my path (or at least opening my eyes to their ignorance) to tug at the strings of my teacher heart so that I would be ready to dive into the new year.

As I write this, I am reminded of Proverbs 3:5-6 ~ Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Seek Him in all you do and He will show you the path to take. I would typically reference this verse when I need or someone needs to make a big decision, but it kind of seems fitting for my current situation as well.  When I put my complete trust in God, He will handle it.  I’m trusting Him with my career choice and leaving my little fella, and He’s taking care of things. 

I pray that you will put your trust in Him in all that you do.  He’s got this!

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